“Tonight I’m Putting the Electronic Girlfriend Away… So I Can Take Care of You Myself”
marswalker(…Is What He Said. Five Minutes Later We Were a Threesome. Again.)
Hey, it’s Ava (29, perpetually late creative) + Leo (31, the guy who charges everything like it’s his religion). We’ve been living together for 18 months and our nightstand basically has a permanent resident: his suction stroker (affectionately named “Electronic GF”). Last night he tried to be all romantic… and it lasted exactly four minutes.
Scene: Friday, 10:12 PM – The “Romantic” Promise
I walk in exhausted, hair in a sad bun, still smelling like subway. Leo greets me at the door with that dangerous half-smirk, arms around my waist, voice low:
Leo: “Babe… tonight the electronic girlfriend is officially benched. I’m doing everything myself.” Me (already melting): “Oh? Big promises, mister.” Leo (kissing my neck): “100% flesh and blood. You and me only.”
We stumble to the bedroom, clothes half-off, fairy lights on, playlist queued to “sexy slow-jam.” I’m thinking: Wow, actual romance.
Scene: 10:16 PM – The Plot Twist
We’re tangled up, breathing heavy, when his hand casually drifts to the nightstand drawer. I raise an eyebrow.
Me: “Um… what are you doing?” Leo (trying to be innocent): “Nothing… just… what if we let her watch?” Me (laughing): “You said she was benched!” Leo (already sliding the stroker out): “Okay, hear me out. Just a little assist. Like… moral support?” Me (fake offended): “So five minutes in and you’re already calling backup?!” Leo (grinning like an idiot): “She’s not backup, she’s seasoning.”
Five seconds later I’m grabbing my suction remote vibe because fair is fair.
Me: “Fine. If she’s playing, he is too.” Leo: “Deal. Threesome it is.”
Scene: 10:25 PM – The Actual Threesome Begins
We’re both half-laughing, half-turned-on as we sync the apps.
Leo (stroker humming to life): “Ready for the remix?” Me (vibe slipping in, clit suction kicking in): “Born ready.”
Round 1 – Slow Tease Leo’s moving over me, warm and real, while his toy adds that perfect suction rhythm. I’m trying to keep a straight face but the combo is ridiculous.
Me (breathless): “This is cheating. This is ABSOLUTE cheating.” Leo (smirking against my ear): “You’re literally vibrating right now, who’s cheating?”
Round 2 – Wave Mode Chaos We accidentally hit the same wave pattern at the same time.
Me: “Oh my god, it’s like we’re in a washing machine.” Leo (laughing so hard he almost loses rhythm): “A very expensive, very sexy washing machine.”
Round 3 – The Final Boss We go full sync + max settings. I’m grabbing the sheets, he’s grabbing me, both toys are basically screaming.
Me (basically yelling): “I hate you, I love you, I—” Leo (voice cracking): “Same, babe, SAME—”
We finish at the exact same second, collapse into a sweaty, giggling pile.
Scene: 1:47 AM – Post-Game Debrief
Leo (panting, stroking my hair): “So… electronic girlfriend definitely MVP tonight.” Me (face in pillow): “You lasted four whole minutes without her. New personal record.” Leo (fake wounded): “I’m a romantic!” Me: “You’re a menace with a USB cable.”
The stroker is quietly charging on the nightstand like nothing happened. We high-five it on the way to brush our teeth.
Official Relationship Stats After Last Night
- Times he said “just us tonight”: 1
- Minutes before the toys joined: 4
- Total orgasms: 6 (3 each)
- Hours of sleep: …who needs sleep
Final Verdict
“Tonight I’m doing it myself” = adorable lie. “Tonight we’re a chaotic threesome with rechargeable sidekicks” = the chaotic truth we both secretly love.
Suction remote vibe + couple suction stroker = the holy grail of “romance.” Still obsessed? Same link, same enablers: https://elysium.top/
Comment your own “I swear just us tonight” fails! Q1. How many minutes before the toys crash the party at your place? Q2. Who caves and grabs them first—you or your partner?
Top 3 chaotic couples win a suction threesome starter pack 🎁 (Ends Dec 20)
If this made you laugh-snort, tag your partner with “this is us.” #ThreesomeWithToys #ElectronicGFJoinedAnyway #SuctionStroker #SuctionRemoteVibe #CoupleChaos #RomanceWithUSB
Ava & Leo’s Overcharged Love Log – Where “just us” never stays just us
